


Friends with Benefits...

by bavedecrapaud



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Aurors, F/M, Feels, Friends With Benefits, Lovers, Magic, NSFW, Oral Sex, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Post-Sirius Black in Azkaban, Reader-Insert, Rough Sex, Sex, Sex with Sirius Black, Sirius Black Lives, Smut, older sirius
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-31
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:00:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24121723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bavedecrapaud/pseuds/bavedecrapaud
Summary: You've slept with Sirius before, years ago. What happens when he's back in your life and wants to pick up where you left off? It's just sex, right? Or is it...
Relationships: Sirius Black/Reader
Comments: 20
Kudos: 136





	1. Chapter one

**Author's Note:**

> Sirius x Reader  
> Older Sirius  
> NSFW! 18+
> 
> Disclaimer: All characters are assumed 18+  
> Warnings: CONTAINS SMUT! DO NOT read if you are under 18!

“Okay, Y/L/N?”

“Yes?” 

There was a pause while Peters checked his list “…Black! Black? Where are you…? There you are, please step forward.”

Materialising from a group of new recruits, stepped forward a man who could only be described as devastating. A sharp jawline flanked chiseled cheekbones which framed slate grey eyes. Eyes that seemed as though they could look into your very soul. 

The aristocratic features seemed haughty until they were interrupted by tendrils of shoulder length wavy hair licking sides of his forehead and cheeks. 

Peters frowned slightly as he glanced at tattoos peeking out of rolled up sleeves and an undone shirt collar. “Y/L/N you will be paired with Black while you show him the ropes….”

Of course you were. “Hello Sirius.”

“Hello, Y/N.” His smile was wide,

“Do you two know each other?” 

Sirius answered for you.“Yes we do.” A simple reply yet leaving all manner of ‘how’ on the table.

“Not like that!” You quickly replied, glancing hurriedly to Peters….although that wasn’t entirely true.

Sirius looked at you knowingly, sending you right back to when you were 19 and falling for him for the first time. 

He was everything you wanted and needed back then: fun, spontaneous, and so open to trying anything. You remembered how young you were and how scary the world had become. Turning up on his doorstep to release all your stress and pent up energy was a lifeline in those troubled times.

And what a release it was. Some of the sex you two shared was the most intimate of your life so far. You think it had to do with how open he was, happy to learn with you, and never made you feel awkward or embarrassed.

“A bit like that.” Sirius grinned further, shaking you out of your reverie. You rolled your eyes at his dirty smile, ignoring the fluttering within. _It’ll be fine._ “Come on Sirius, I’ll show you the ropes.”

His grin became wider as he followed you out of the briefing room - god he was incorrigible. 

“Stop it Sirius!” You said under your breath as you turned on your heel and strode off towards your office.

“Hey, you could have said we worked together for the Order, Y/N!” He rebutted holding up his hands innocently.

“You know the Ministry doesn’t know nor need to know about the Order, hence why they have you ‘training’ to be a dark wizard catcher.” You indicated to a door on your right and gestured him inside. “How’d you swing this by the way?”

“You say that like I didn’t sit the exam and get selected legitimately.” He looked mildly affronted. 

“Really?!”

Sirius merely shrugged, “there are a lot of things you miss out on when you don’t hang out with us anymore Y/N!” 

You began to open your mouth to apologise. Making yourself scarce around your old friends and former comrades hit a nerve, a guilty nerve that you constantly felt the need to justify, Sirius however bet you to it.

“I know, I know - you’re a big busy Auror. Now come on - show me what you’ve got!”

He sat on your desk and looked at you waiting.

The need to clear your throat caught you up to the fact you were staring at him. You hadn’t been quite this near to him in a long time, and with no one to interrupt you, those eyes were dangerous and distracting.

“Oh..ok, well, normal training covers, duelling, logistics, reports, and rounds. We can start with duelling. We’ll have to put on a show for the assessment protocols. Once these are signed off you’ll be ready to start and introduced to your new partner. It should only take a couple of weeks.”

“You’re not my partner, Y/N?”

“No, I’m not - you’ll be assigned someone at the same level as you, although knowing how you duel, you’ll far outclass me in skill and ability.”

Instead of looking flattered, Sirius merely frowned, seeming confused.

You ignored his unuttered question and picked up the trainee paperwork, “Ok, So - duelling right away. Yes? Let’s get to it!” 

He got up off your desk, another smirk gracing his features. “Ok.”

“Stop it,” you tapped him in his side instantly feeling something at the contact, even briefly, on his body. 

_Don’t get too close._ Your brain reminded you. It was a mantra you had held onto when you found out Sirius was free and you would be seeing him regularly since Dumbledore had reassembled the Order.

As he fell into step beside you, your mind thought back to those months. Sirius was, understandably, different since Azkaban. He was harder, less quick to laughter, and far more serious. All these changes did nothing but serve him well in the second war, however, you sometimes missed the carefree Sirius who wasn’t constantly calculating escape routes or worrying about what people thought.

“Whoa!” Sirius exclaimed as you entered the training area. It was a high ceilinged, rabbit warren of a room, with jutting walls, hurdles, sweeping metal beams along the roof, and debris littering the ground.

“Yeah… it could use a bit of a once over but it’s good for training especially around London.” You indicated to the faux cobbled pathways mimicking the city streets. “Those beats can get pretty messy!”

Sirius nodded and made an odd movement, causing you to do a double-take. He was looking at you with a blazing look, one that you hadn’t seen in 17 years. A fire had lit in his belly and he was quivering, ever so slightly, with excitement.

He walked up to you achingly slowly, bent towards your mouth, and just when he almost made contact he moved his head to the side to whisper in your ear, “Don’t go easy on me now, Y/N.”

The momentary blackout caused by his closeness caught you off guard. And it was that mistake that had you on a defensive, racing around dodging his spells for the next hour.

“Ok! Ok! I give up - I SURRENDER!” Sweating and panting heavily, you had grasped your knees, half bent over to catch your breath.

“Sirius appeared from behind a corner, equally hot and bothered; “That was some workout you gave me Y/N.”

You rolled your eyes at him. He ran circles around you and he knew it.

“Well, I’d say that’s dueling passed then. Next, we’ll look at logistics but how about tomorrow yeah? I need a break!.”

Sirius looked at you with amused disappointment; “Really? You used to have more stamina that that, Y/N.”

You choked on your breath. Sirius was a flirt sure but he hadn’t been this blatantly bold since you were in your 20s.

Out of practice and not able to match him you settled with…”Oh yeah…well I…I haven’t had any coffee today.”

He smiled at you warmly. “Come on then, let’s get you back to your rocking chair.”

You didn’t have the strength to argue and in all honestly the way he placed his arm around your waist, encouraging you to stand straight was all you could focus on.

——-

“Knock knock.” A voice called from the hallway. 

“You know you aren’t actually supposed to say the words, you can use your hands for this one!”

“Mmm well, it’s a bit difficult when you’ve got your hands full.” Sirius was standing in your office doorway, looking handsome, freshly shaven - a coffee in each hand completing the picture of ecstasy.

“For me?!” You gestured to one of the cups excitedly.

“M’lady.” He replied handing you the cup. “So what have we got planned for today then, you’ve got me all day - no excuses as you have had your coffee now.” He grinned mischievously seeing you realise this as you took a sip.

“Oh so this was a bride coffee, huh?”

“Yep!” Said Sirius confidently as he sat down on your desk again.

“A small price to pay for your time, Y/N.”

“Yeah well, I am cheap.” You countered causing him to choke on his cup.

That jab served you well as Sirius was off his game all day.

You thought about his sudden change in behaviour, last night - what it had meant and come to the conclusion that it meant nothing. He was always charming and it must have been a relief to be placed with a familiar face on your first day, plus taking into account everyone was more relaxed now the war had ended, personalities were bound to come back.

Smiling as Sirius removed the coffee stains from his shirt you invited him to follow you to the training room to complete day two of his assessments. Trying and failing not to notice the form of his pectorals through his wet shirt.

Each morning Sirius brought you coffee, and each day he edged a little closer to you. Never touching too long or offering up himself, but just enough to cause a wanton need in your loins. It was maddening.

“Fuck!” You exclaimed to yourself one afternoon. 

“Everything alright, Y/N?”

You whipped your head up to see Sirius standing in the doorway.

“Yeah, ah, yes Sirius fine..I, I thought you were leaving?”

“Well, I was but then it occurred to me that it’s been a big week and I should ask you if you wanted to join me for a drink on your way home?”

Every smart cell in your brain yelled _‘NO!’_ At the same time, your voice said: “Thanks Sirius, actually that’d be great.”

——-

“You know I feel like I’m the student here.” You quipped as Sirius queried the logistical layout of Auror procedure, indicating several areas where the process could be improved. 

One drink had turned into two, 30 minutes turned into 90, and somehow your student had turned into the teacher.

He was smart and intelligent and that did nothing to help quash a growing yearning for him that you were trying and failing to ignore.

“I’m lucky I got such a great trainee!” You blurted, trying to reorder your wandering thoughts.

Sirius smiled and looked at you for a moment, “Can I tell you a secret?” You nodded. “I asked for you?”

“Why?”

“Because you are the best!”

You snorted into your drink.

He placed his hand on yours, “I mean it.”

Gulping, you looked down at his hand as he rubbed his thumb across your knuckles. You remembered what that hand could do. You flashed a look at him, and it was as if the thought capitalised that moment to jump from your mind to his. He withdrew his hand with rapid speed, rallying himself and trying to change the conversation.

Moving past that awkward moment, the rest of the evening was spent in pleasant chatter, dodging multiple slips into innuendo -mostly on his end - and ending with Sirius doing wonderful impressions of you and the Order members in their younger years.

This was the Sirius you remembered. He was starting to come out of his shell. 

_——-_

Sirius was not only filling up all your days, he was infiltrating your dreams as well. Dirty, debaucherous dreams that you wished you could indulge in for real.

_Stop it Y/N!_ You had to tell yourself on many occasions. You had to constantly halt yourself from making innuendo with him, at him, around him. He was quickly and quietly rendering your self-control to nil.

“So much for not getting too close.” You muttered under your breath as you watched him talk to fellow colleagues in the briefing room. Even the way he moved, muscles popping subtly under crisp shirts, was going to be the death of you.

He was inhaling his training, completing each test with marvellous results. You forgot that Sirius, when he applied himself, was excellent. He was smart and so mentally stimulating you to feel a pang of longing. 

On the final day of his training, he had to accompany you on an evening round. You set off about 7pm ready to get out of the office and the tension that had been building around you for the past two weeks.

This was futile. Sirius was just as charming and just as much as a magnet regardless how much fresh air you tried to put between you. 

Your beat was simple, it covered a 19km area North East of central London. Your plan was to highlight the red spots in the area, tell him how you dealt with problem zones, and make sure to introduce him to locals along the way. They could be invaluable when in need of information and managing relationships with them was paramount to catching, finding, searching for leads.

Walking past a dirty grey door you stopped, and pointed towards a couple of wooden crates where a brown lump was resting.“Ah, this is Trevor. Hey mate! Anything to report today?” 

Trevor made no sound but merely just stood from his post, stretched and blinked at you.

“Got it - you have a good day!” Scratching him on his chin you moved away, missing the incredulous look on Sirius’ face.

“Do you always talk to cats, Y/N?” Sirius asked, not bothering to remove the amusement from his voice.

You laughed. “Well, you never know who is a real pet and who isn’t, eh?” He smirked as you nudged him.

“That reminds me you should use your animagus skills one day. I can take you for a walk, pretend you’re my good boy!”

“You want me to wear a collar and a lead?”

“Yes, of course! In case you are naughty.”

“Will you spank me if I am then?”

Even though you were outside, the air around you grew thicker. He laced no jovial joking tone in that sentence - it was almost like he was asking you to do it.

_Could you say it?_ The urge to retort back was too strong and before you could stop yourself you had said: “Well, I’ve been there done that, Sirius.” He looked down at this but not before you saw him biting his lip, the corners of his mouth lifting, giving up a hidden smile. 

This the first time you had referred to an obvious moment in your past arrangement - it accelerated his desire 10 fold.

“Although… never mind.” You trailed off.

“What?” He was immeasurably curious. 

“Well, if I had known that was our last time I would have made more effort!” He said nothing but looked at you, eyes dark and it felt just like the last time.

You had both stopped walking, and if you had time you would have noticed the begging almost sad look in his eyes.

Movement behind his shoulder indicated you weren’t the only people out on the street. You quickly grabbed Sirius by his shirt collar and pulled him into a tight alley space between two buildings.

Chest to chest, you were still clinging onto Sirius’ shirt as you peered round the corner of the wall trying to secure the identity of the lone wizard without being seen.

Squinting through the darkening sky you managed to make out a rough description. He was known to the Ministry, a person of interest but not doing anything illegal so far. Nothing to do but note he was around this area. You let out a breath of relief at the same time you felt puffs of Sirius’ breath in your ear.

You dropped your hands as you realised you were pressed against him and suddenly it was an avalanche of yearning. You felt him lightly reach out to your hanging arm and gently stroke your hand with his fingers.

God, this again - it was JUST like last time but you were grown, he’s grown and what a man he had grown into: he was bigger, broader in shoulder with more muscles hugging his frame. The subtle lines on his face indicated man, not boy and the physical strength he commanded just purely standing in front of you was daunting and incredibly sexy. Plus he smelt divine: Musky, strong, and audacious.

He didn’t do anything but waited. Sirius never pushed or lead you on - you guessed it was his way - he let you know where he was at and waited for you to make up your mind. It was torturous, the sheer confidence of his ability to do that floored you - he never showed hesitation nor wavered.

At the feel of his touch on your hand, you turned your head to him, looked into his eyes and saw he was looking down at you, you knew that look.

Breath falling on your lips, he leant further. You knew he was going to just get there and stop like he always used to, waiting for you to complete the move, However, he continued, nudging your mouth up with his and he kissed you. Softly - like he was afraid of hurting you.

That was a surprise! You halted, a momentary delay, as you processed Sirius going all in before you kissed him back. Hurriedly.

His free hand came to rest on the wall beside your head, he grabbed the hand he’d been touching, looped it over his shoulder and around his neck and took you by the waist.

Head spinning, senses threatening to overwhelm your consciousness you lost yourself in his kiss.

You were certain this was your over-eager brain misinterpreting the actions but it wasn’t a kiss you had experienced with him before. It was like he had been waiting, building up to kiss you and throw everything he had into it.

His tongue swept across your lips, prising them open and he deepened the kiss as he flicked his tongue across yours. 

You could feel his stubble, deliciously scraping across your mouth as he continued to ruin you with his.

It felt like Sirius was breathing life into you, you had not forgotten what it was like to kiss him but this was new. He was desperate in his movements and he seemed to be pouring all the want in his soul into you.

Worrying you may pass out from the sheer ecstasy that was being in Sirius Black’s embrace, you broke apart. He hung onto you, breathing heavily. His eyes bore down into yours intently as he rasped: “Godric, I have to have you, Y/N. Please….please say you want me?”

Not even for a second did you let yourself think: _should I?_

“Oh Sirius” You replied as you kissed him again. “Just one last time yeah?”

He made to answer you but you had just remembered something. It stirred back in the depths of your memories from years ago, you had stored it obviously not for future use but because it brought you so much joy.

You stood on your tiptoes, reached up to lick and suck lightly on his earlobe. He growled. Loudly. You smiled. Widely. It was still the same, this was his trigger, the metaphorical switch for his ‘beast mode.’

He pushed you against the wall and rammed his body against you, kissing, rough, hard, painfully gripping you like you were going to run away.

He grabbed your arse and squeezed it, groaning audibly as you bit his bottom lip.

“Are we done here?” He said, indicating the job.

At your nod, he grabbed you tighter and apparated you together.

You stumbled into Sirius, shoving him against a cool tiled wall, as you knocked over a wicker basket full of clothes.

You were at Grimmauld Place, in Sirius’s bathroom. He meant his bedroom but he overshot it in his frenzy.

Not able to have you fast enough Sirius pulled at your shirt, trying to remove it then pushed you up against the sink, turning you round to get more of your clothing off.

His kisses were growing more frantic, which turned you on even further. While he began pulling down your tights, you reached around behind you to undo his belt.

The feel of his body pressing against your back was utter perfection and he couldn’t bear down into you hard enough.

You saw at yourself in the mirror above the sink, you looked wanton and sexy and alive.

He was kissing your neck, reaching his hand down your pants making contact with that little bead of electrodes primed and ready for his touch.

“Y/N! Oh Godric!” His hands were everywhere: Ripping your shirt to feel your breasts, touching the nerve between your legs, and gripping your sides.

You helped him lift up your skirt and undo his belt shoving one hand down his pants, searching until you found a hard velvety appendage that made him groan at your touch. He continued to kiss whichever skin he could reach and press your pelvis into the sink, rubbing your clit with his fingers and his erection into your palm. 

God, he’d gotten you into a craze and you couldn’t wait any longer. You grabbed his cock and helped guide it to your entrance, both stilling for a moment as he slid into your core remembering the feeling of him and you; inch by inch until he was fully inside and moving rhythmically, thrusting up into you. 

You could see his face in the mirror: chin over your shoulder, eyes closed, mouth open in an expression of utter ecstasy. Godric, you loved how much he always got involved; no fear or nervousness to show you how turned on he was or how fast you were going to make him come.

He wrapped his arm around your waist as he continued to thrust, burying his face in your hair, sucking on your neck and when he could get you to turn your head, your mouth.

One hand grasped the sink and you placed your own on top of it bending slightly, pushing your butt against him. He smiled, remembering how much you loved doggy style.

Sirius leant back and drove further into you, the groans and expletives were getting louder now, he was fucking you harder. Suddenly, he grabbed your arse, changed his angle, and hit a spot that jolted you forward, your arms knocking his toothbrush holder and the soap dish to the floor. Oh, God!

You placed your hand between your legs rubbing your clit, helping to get you there so you could come with him.

_S_ irius was in heaven. Being next to you all day every day was amazing but it had done nothing to negate indecorous thoughts of you from his mind. You were paying him far more attention than you had in the Order - he supposed it was the training but he wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. When you indicated you wanted to spank him he lost all rational thought. He was no good and would be no good at any more training that night. He couldn’t keep his need for you silent any longer and right now he was praising Merlin he had made a move. 

Sirius distantly remembered what it was like to be in you but feeling the feelings again after so long was driving him insane. The way you clenched your walls around him caused him to explode with elation every thrust. You were definitely the best he had ever had. The squeeze from his balls and the bursts of electricity at each pop of his hips told him that. All he wanted to do was touch you everywhere and make you feel as good as him. The sight of your round arse in his hands and the look on your face in the mirror as he fucked you would never not rev him in the most triumphant way. 

_Fuck this feels good! God, I love this!_ Was the mantra going round and round his head, followed by: _don’t come too soon!_ He watched you begin to touch yourself and he began to break.

He pulled out and dropped to his knees behind you, grasping your hips as he buried his face in you.

You smiled as his tongue licked your folds and his fingers flicked your clit. You should have known. Sirius always wanted to be the one to make you come.

The circles he was making with his mouth, the sheer need, and aggression he put into driving you crazy bought your orgasm forward. “Oh Godric, Sirius YES! Keep doing that!.”

Gripping the sink with both hands your legs began to shake and though his fingers did not relent vibrating your clit, his tongue stopped licking up and down and moved inside you. He knew this would get you, you rarely had time to contemplate how he remembered as your orgasm rinsed through you.

Legs threatening to collapse you grabbed the sink once more ready to pull yourself up only to find your tights being pulled off completely, waist grabbed, swung round and pulled down to kneel on the ground, straddling Sirius’, aching erection.

Another thing you remembered, Sirius liked to come while facing you. He must be close. He kissed you deeply as you adjusted yourself and waited for you to come down from your high. He didn’t have to wait long, in what seemed like seconds, you had slid down onto him as he kissed you, causing him to shudder and groan out loud.

Grinding up and down his shaft, him lifting you, faster and faster, squeezing him as you popped, flicking your hips forward at the top.

You could tell he was close, he breathed out in grunts, he gripped at your hair, your shoulder, your side. Grunts and groans stopped and started as you rolled your hips forward in a wave-like motion faster and faster. Suddenly, he slammed his head back against the wall and let out a guttural groan ending in your name over and over again.

Sirius didn’t let you go as he came down from is high and you weren’t complaining, sometimes, basking in the afterglow was your favourite moment with him.

“Fuck, I love having sex with you, Y/N.”

You both exhaled loudly, laughing.

“I am sure you do Sirius, but remember - this was a once-off!” 

He raised his eyebrow at you, “Are you sure? You say this but I’m still inside you.”

This was the moment to leave - You kissed him once more, deeply, and made to stand up, wobbling slightly and making him chuckle.

Looking at the state of his bathroom you smiled. Definitely redeemed yourself. “I better go submit our report for tonight, see you next week - you’ll have your new partner and I have the next trainee so I’ll catch you at the morning briefings perhaps.”

Pulling on your tights and boots you looked at him, he looked utterly spent, still sitting on the bathroom floor, shirt half off, pants around his ankles, breathing deeply, and leaning against the shower door.

He nodded slowly and dropped his head back, exhaling. 

The look on his face, dazed, satisfied, thoroughly fucked, caused you to grin down to your bones.

Giving him one last kiss you picked up your coat and walked out the door into the landing.

You turned around as you disapparated to catch him with his head in his hands. 

Immediately the afterglow drained away - this is why you were not supposed to get too close: He was, already regretting what he had done, regretting you. It was just like last time.


	2. Chapter two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You've slept with Sirius before, years ago. What happens when he's back in your life and wants to pick up where you left off? It's just sex, right? Or is it...
> 
> Sirius x Reader  
> Older Sirius  
> NSFW! 18+
> 
> Disclaimer: All characters are assumed 18+  
> Warnings: CONTAINS SMUT! DO NOT read if you are under 18!

You couldn’t quite believe it, History was repeating itself again. 

All the clever avoidance techniques and self-imposed absences away from your friends had failed to prevent what they were set in place for.

Leaning back on your front door, still managing to hold your wobbly body upright, you were transported back in time.

~~~

_The first war was in full swing; people disappearing, not knowing who to trust, being sent on crazy missions with the order - you were so young._

_At times you didn’t know how you survived, then you remembered you had just met Sirius. A rebellious, strong, cheeky, confident, and slightly arrogant boy. He wasn’t your type. He was too charming, too easy on the eyes, and too cocky._

_This was at first, then you got to know him. His charm was genuine, it wasn’t his fault looking at his face could melt your knickers, and the aforementioned cockiness, that was just bravado and a facade to hide deep scars._

_Slowly you started to think that maybe he was a bit of alright. Whenever you were at a bar, women approached him - It was hard to get him on his own, however, he had this way of appearing by your side when you least expected it._

_He had hit on you of course, with little success. You ‘worked’ with him, had begun to establish a basis of friendship - fraternising was not a good idea. Or was it? However, as the months trickled by, you couldn’t help thinking of him. Though you were sure you didn’t want a relationship, you wondered if Sirius might be interested in an arrangement of sorts. How to ask him though? Subtly via a note? Bold and upfront? What would you even say? “Hey Sirius, I like your face - can I sit on it?” Or “Sirius, what are your thoughts on casual sex with a friend?” Or maybe, have him overhear you talking to Lily about wanting a fuck buddy. It all seemed either too flippant or too cringeworthy.  
  
In the end, you didn’t have to do anything. He read your mind. Literally. Dumbledore had you all practicing Legilimency_ _one evening and you were partnered with Sirius. Your goal was to mask a randomly assigned location by thinking of the phrase: “I won’t tell you.” As others tried to enter your mind.  
  
Yours backfired spectacularly. His presence in your mind set off a domino effect of yearning. The lust was too much and you couldn’t control it. You kept the test location hidden but instead of thinking “I won’t tell you” your betraying mind said, “I want to have sex with you." _

_He definitely heard you. You saw it on his face, the minute you had thought the words. His eyes widened and he initially looked shocked until his features changed to a wry smile and a dirty gleam in his eyes._

_It was a wondrous arrangement. He wasn’t your type which is what made the friends with benefits - no strings rule, perfect. Initially your attraction to him was purely surface deep. That face! How could one not swoon? That body! And, boy did he know what to do with it. Being with Sirius meant stolen kisses at every opportune and not so opportune moment, earth-shattering orgasms, and sex everywhere - there wasn’t a surface in his house that you hadn’t Christened._

_He was light and fun and as you got to know him further; incredibly intelligent and fierce for his friends. He protected all of you as his life depended on it. Which is why it came as a huge shock when he was arrested._

_You were sure you were one of the many who had intimate carnal knowledge of Sirius, but even so, you felt you ‘knew’ him down to his bones, and back then the likelihood he was a Voldemort supporter was laughable._

_You had attempted talking to Remus but he was distant, constantly in his own head, and getting thoughts out of him was like squeezing blood from a stone._

_All the evidence pointed to Sirius though. That was made abundantly clear as you were subject to multiple hours of questioning by the Ministry over his intentions. Part of you could never quite believed it. This was just so out of character._

_One of the few reasons you were not hauled off to Azkaban as an accomplice was, by the time Lily and James were killed, you had stopped seeing Sirius. That had happened over a period of weeks. Everything had been fine and your ‘arrangement’ was moving like clockwork, but something was changing._

_He had become quieter, less likely to burst into laughter and he seemed far more serious all the time around you yet so awkward as well._

_It unsettled you and you started seeing him less. You figured he was getting bored of you. A man like him who had women falling at his feet left and right couldn’t stay yours forever. This thought, though at first palatable, was becoming less and less so. You tried to change tack and prove how unserious you were about commitment in case that was what was scaring him off. It killed you to do it but at the moment you needed him, and you were feeling desperate. On one occasion you down right alluded to seeing other men...  
  
“What are you doing today.” He had asked you, watching you pick up clothes from around his room.  
  
“Nothing, did you want to hang out?” He paused and you saw something in his eyes. Panic swirling, you quickly searched for a cover and blurted; “Oh shoot, I can’t I just remembered I have a date tonight.”  
  
He looked at you sharply and smiled but it never reached his eyes. “Y/N, we need to talk.” _

_Those were never good words. A choking feeling like someone has grabbed your throat and you can’t breathe gripped you. You had to get out. Making an excuse you left abruptly before he could say anything._

_Why were you so concerned about this - it was just sex, right? Then hit you - you had feelings for Sirius. No, no no no!_

_Realising you probably needed to face him and foolishly hoping he was just having a moment you tentatively visited him the next day._

_He was awkward. You tried to make light of it, hoping to reassure him that you were not bothered by him and the liaise-faire nature of your fling, all the while hoping this would somehow persuade him to keep it going with you._

_It didn’t work. The harder you tried to play it cool, the more serious he became._

_“Y/N I….” This was it. He was ending your, whatever it was, but you didn’t think you could hear him say it. “Sirius I have to go! I just remembered…” So you left. Again. That was the last time you saw him._

_You avoided Sirius over the next few weeks and eventually, he stopped trying to get a hold of you._

_Thinking of what he might have said, the words he would choose to end it was eating you up. No news was better than bad news and you did everything in your power to reject the bad news for as long as possible, knowing you would eventually have to face him and hear the words. You rationalised this as you needing time, a little bit of it before he officially broke your heart._

_“Tomorrow? Tomorrow, I’ll go and talk to him.” You kept telling yourself._

_Tomorrow never came, as Sirius was arrested and sent to Azkaban, putting a whole new level of tragedy on your situation._

~~~

Drawing these memories back was emotionally exhausting. Sighing, you pushed yourself off the door and began to peel your clothes from your body and get ready for bed. You could still smell Sirius on you as rummaged through your draws, searching for pajamas. That scent both thrilled and saddened you. You were barely able to muster enough energy to wash your face and brush your teeth before you collapsed into bed. Intrusive thoughts of Sirius’ regretful face kept hitting your brain and you threw an arm over your eyes in a futile attempt to shield yourself from them.

Why hadn’t you done more to help him? At least try to force Remus, or someone to really look into this. Sirius constantly maintained that he held no-one accountable for his fate but himself. This humbleness only served to make you feel more guilty. 

In fact, he had told you during one meeting that Kingsley had shown him the transcripts of your interrogations which maintained he was innocent and questioning the lack of Trial. 

You winced at this. Mostly because you had blocked out that particular memory. The interrogation had been grueling and there were some unethical coercive techniques used by the Aurors against you. You were actually lucky to come out of there with only minor injuries.

Sirius never mentioned this but the look in his eyes told you he knew about that too. He did mention, however, how much he appreciated your strength and loyalty which only served to make you feel worse and more guilty for running from him in the first place.  


“You suck, Y/N!” You harrumphed to yourself, listing in your head all the fears you had to overcome.

These unhealthy avoidance coping mechanisms coupled with the fact you knew he didn’t want to see you had frozen you in place and you did nothing.

Over the years the hurt had faded to the back of your mind. Knowing he wanted to end it saved you the horror of wondering ‘what if?’ As there was no such thing. However, this traumatic event planted the seed that you must stop avoiding, and try to grow the confidence in yourself to hear people out. The tendency to run from personal confrontation and stick your head in the sand was detrimental. Not just to yourself but those around you as well. This had to change.

“I hate being a grown-up.” You muttered, turning over and bringing your hand over to massage the frown lines between your eyes.

It was time to step up and face the music. You were going to have to bite the bullet now. No more hiding and running away.

It was actually surprising this realisation hadn’t occurred sooner. Sirius had been back for a few years now. You remembered how you felt the minute Remus told you he was innocent. Vindicated, angry, and so so terribly sad for him.

More memories came crashing forward...  You remembered stepping over the threshold of Grimmauld Place again for the first time in years. You were nervous and couldn’t really feel your fingertips. You were excited to seem him but fearful at the same time. This wouldn’t be like before, you were both older now but just to save yourself the embarrassment of going through that pain again you promised yourself you wouldn’t get too close.

In all honesty that wasn’t hard to do. You didn’t see Sirius much. He was on house arrest and you were never alone with him. He was the same but older, more serious, and definitely stressed. Even if you had wanted to bring up the past you wouldn’t. He was constantly worried about Harry and it became clear early on that he had started drinking a lot...

_“Y/N!” He had slurred one evening at you after a meeting. “C’mere! I haven’t seen you in so long!”_

_“Hi, Sirius.” You had mumbled awkwardly.  
  
“Now why haven’t you come to see me?”  
  
You spluttered at this, dribbling wine down your chin. _

_The kind yet hazy look in his eyes went straight through your heart. You obliged him this time, but in his lubricated state he put his arm around you and began to caress your waist._

_Remus had watched this, noticed your flushed face, and managed to lure Sirius away. It was only then that your breathing came back to normal._

After Voldemort’s final downfall, Sirius started to relax. Then when he was declared a free man - wrongfully accused he really let loose. There were lots of parties and general frivolity. At first, you joined in, the excitement and cheerful vibes not helping to keep you away, but as each event followed after another you began to notice Sirius watching you. Little side looks progressed to wide open glances. You would be flattered but his eyes held a strange emotion. Was that pity?

As soon as you realized this you were gone. You couldn’t bear it - he didn’t need to explain himself and as long as you never heard the words fall out of his mouth the rejection never happened.

You avoided him once more and once more, he eventually gave up trying to approach you and left you alone. All was well and fine until he started working with you. You thought you could dabble one more time without getting hurt and that had backfired tremendously.

Punching your pillow in frustration, you knew what you needed to do.

As though she heard your thoughts, a ‘tap tap tapping’ on your window roused you. Only one thing made that noise. Turning on the bedside lamp you crossed your room to open your window and let Capella, your screech owl, in from her hunting.

“Before you get comfortable, I need you to deliver a letter for me.” She looked at you reproachfully before ruffling her feathers in an “ok, fine.” gesture.  
  
You scribbled quickly.

  
  
_“Sirius,_

_We should talk._

_  
Meet me at the little cafe where Trevor sleeps tomorrow, 11 am?_

_  
Please send a reply, she’ll wait until you do._

_  
Y/N”_

Attaching the letter to Capella’s leg, you exhaled. “Let’s get this over with, then. Don’t come back without a reply please, Cap ok?” She hooted at you and flew off into the night, and you watched her until she was too far away to call back. 

Feeling somewhat awake you reasoned that as you were up now you might as well wash properly, and jumped into the shower.  
  
Capella was waiting for you by the time you had put your pajamas back on.

Sirius’ reply was short and sweet:

  
  
_“Ok, see you then.  
_

_S”_

Slumping back over to your bed you sat down, Sirius’ note folded in your hands. What had you done? Well became a grown-up for one but bugger it if it didn’t feel yuck.

—-

You shifted for the tenth time in the wicker cafe chair. It was 10 am - you were early.

After getting up at 5 am, cleaning your entire studio including washing, drying, and folding your bedsheets you were not able to distract yourself any longer and set off for the little cafe you had passed on your beat only hours ago. You found a free table outside with a view of the street and sat down, hands wrapped around each other in your lap.

You had to tell the waiter twice that you were waiting for a friend and will order when he gets here. Odd glances were thrown your way from other patrons as you sat by yourself with no food or drink and it did not help to calm your nerves.  
  
Just as you began to wish you had bought something to occupy yourself with you felt a rummaging at your feet, looking under the table you saw Trevor - obviously turning in from a night on the prowl. “Hello mate.” 

He looked at you, yawned, and jumped up on the chair adjacent.

“Long night huh?” You asked him. “Me too.” Trevor said nothing and began to lick his fur.  
  
You sat in comfortable silence while Trevor groomed himself.

“Would you like to order now miss?” The waiter had returned. Looking at Trevor and back at you.  
  
It took a moment until you laughed, pointing to Trevor and said - “Well, I waiting for another friend but perhaps you would like to take Trevor’s order?” The waiter simpered a smile at you before returning inside mumbling abut time wasters.

Giggling slightly you turned back to Trevor, you had his attention now. He had stopped his grooming and looked at you pointedly, his hello eyes screwed and questioning.

“Yes, the one from last night.” You answered. “He’s coming to tell me… something.” You sighed for what felt like the 100th time. “Something I should have let him tell me years ago.” You looked down at your knees, eyes threatening to water.

Minutes passed and you remained staring at your knees. You didn’t look up at Trevor’s quiet meow so instead he jumped gracefully into your lap.

You sniffed and absentmindedly began to scratch Trevor’s belly. He wasn’t a fan of this but he allowed it.

“I was a big coward, Trev. I just like him so much, too much! I never wanted just a fling but if that’s all I could get then I’d take it.”

You paused scratching behind Trevor’s ears. “I’ve royally fucked it up - I know it. I fooled around and fell for him and I... I just knew it was going to hurt so much from someone I admire, even love to be told he didn’t want me.”  
  
“I never said that.” Your head shot up, eyes blinking at a man standing in front of you.

“Sirius!” You squealed. “Where did you, how did you… you’re early!”

He smiled and sat down at the same time Trevor leaped lightly off your lap and pottered off down the street.

As Sirius settled himself in the seat next to yours you began to shuffle nervously. _How much did he hear?_ You suddenly didn’t know what to do with your hands. Do you rest them on the table? Your lap? Why did they feel heavy all of a sudden? Sirius saved you the decision by taking them in his own.  
  
He was silent as he held your hands in his, watching you with an odd expression you were unable to analyse. You could hear your heart in your eardrums. His hands felt so warm and lovely. _Focus on this_ , your brain told you. The flight response was getting stronger and you could feel every nerve ending standing to attention. Still, you forced yourself to stay present. _I wish he’d get this over with_ , the final thought crossing through your mind before he spoke.

“So you wanted more than a fling, huh?” Sirius looked at you, his face still unreadable.   
  
You nodded slowly and his features morphed into a pained expression. Though you had prepared for this, it hurt just like the first time. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He implored you.  
  
You just shook your head and looked down. 

“Y/N,” He asked softly, brushing a finger under your chin, pushing it gently upwards.  
  
 _This was it_ you thought, the tremors preceding the cracking in your heart vibrated outward as you locked eyes with him once more.  
  
“Y/N, I never not wanted you. What made you think that?”  
  
The shock on your face and dawning realisation on Sirius’ halted the conversation for several seconds.

“Is that why you kept avoiding me?” He asked  
  
“Well, you said you wanted to talk to me, it sounded serious and grim? I thought you were trying to tell me you didn’t want to see me anymore.”  
  
Sirius, sat back in his seat at this point, letting your hands go and looking at the street in front of him an incredulous expression on his face.  
  
“You know it’s funny you saying that you would take all you can get from me as that’s how I felt until it started to kill me when you would talk so dismissively about our relationship especially when you would mention other men."  
  
A grimace hit your face, you did remember doing that - all in an effort to show him how ‘relaxed’ and ‘easy-going’ you were about him.  
  
You opened your mouth to apologise by he cut you off.  
  
“I like you Y/N. I dangerously like you. Always have.” He smiled grasping your hands in his again, one reaching up to stroke your face.  
  
“Please stop calling me ‘mate’”  
  
You tried and failed to stop a smile. “What did you want me to call you then?”  
  
“Well…” He smirked, “I can think of plenty of names but ‘my boyfriend’ is a good start.”

Your mouth form and ‘O’ of amazement. Not able to speak through the shock and delight whipping through your soul you squeezed his hand back giving him reassurance.

“I never wanted to talk to you to turn you down. I wanted…. I want to see how you feel about being exclusive? Being my girlfriend?”  
  
 _Yes! Yes! I’m in. I would love to. I’ve waited so long to hear you say that!_ Where some of the many affirmative answers flashing through your mind, but instead what your voice chose to say was: “Why now?”

“Why not? It’s been so long and I can’t hold it in anymore. I damn near told you I loved you after sex last night.”  
  
You blushed again at the memory of Sirius pressed up against you, hands all around you feeling his way into your ecstasy.

“I prepared myself for you to say no and I debated just staying as we were but I’m not strong enough to stay away.”  
  
“Sirius.” You reached out to touch his face and he closed his eyes, turning his head to kiss your open palm.  
  
“Y/N, I fell in love with you 17 years ago, and it is still there.”

This struck you like a lightning rod. Rendering you speechless. Why were you faltering now? He had just confessed his love for you - and that’s when it hit you. The stakes were infinitely higher now. You didn’t want to muck this up. 

“S-sirius?” You whispered. “What do you want in a girlfriend?”  
  
“I want you, Y/N.”  
  
His eyes held nothing but genuine sincerity and his warm hands traced your face with tender air. He leaned in and tilted his head to one side. You closed your eyes letting his scent wash over you. Invigorating, stimulating, and incredibly him. Sirius’ lips connected with yours and immediately you opened your lips to him ask in further.

Lascivious urges flooded you as the kiss turned heated and you had a hard time telling your brain to shut up about ‘public places’ and ‘common decency’ until a loud series of ‘Ahem!’ Was heard above. 

The waiter was back. “Ready to order now?” Judging but the emphasis he put on his consonants, he wasn’t thrilled.  
  
“Nothing for me thanks, mate,” Sirius answered throwing a note on the table and taking you by the hand as he stood up.

Looking briefly at the annoyed face of the waiter you pulled Sirius’s hand and walked quickly back to the same alleyway where he had first kissed you last night. Not stopping to check if you had left anything behind, you held him tightly to you and disapparated the both of you to your home.

Sirius looked around as your small apartment appeared around him. He smiled at the comfortable looking couch parked in front of the fireplace, the stream of festoon lights draped around the mantle. He marveled at your chic and very tidy kitchen, he noticed various pieces of artwork and photos on your walls, and finally, his eyes fell on a light wooden bed with a large squishy looking duvet.

“I like it!” He said turning to you, removing his jacket and draping it across the couch. “It looks like you.” 

Smiling slightly and starting to feel nervous again the initial heat you had felt while kissing him shifted slightly to make way for a feeling of not knowing what to do, so you started to give him a tour. “This is the kitchen.” You picked up a mug and pointed at the kettle. He shook his head. 

“That’s the lounge area.” You pointed to the fireplace, “…and this…this is the bedroom.”

Sirius was watching you like a fox watches a rabbit. A slow side smile emerged on his lips and he softly uttered, “is that so?”

By the way his eyes bore into yours you felt giddy and faint. This look, a desperate, excited look promising all sorts of pleasures x-rayed through you. It held more than lust though. He looked at you with a sense of relief, confidence, and love. You wondered if he could see down into your soul. He had seen all of you, many times. Explored areas of your body with an eagerness that riled anyone else but that look held so much emotion and knowing, you had never felt so exposed.

You finally had him where you had always wanted him and now you didn’t know what to do.

He did though.

Making his way slowly over to you, he reached out and ran his hand down your arm, stopping when he felt your hand in his. 

“Are you nervous, Y/N?”

“A little bit.”

“Well, why don’t we take this slowly?” You raised an eyebrow at him questioning his meaning.

“Kiss me, Y/N.” He leaned down, brushing his lips against your cheeks, waiting.

An immediate surge of desire overwhelmed you and before you could overthink, your heart took over and urged you forward,

His kiss, not at all rushed, was soft, slow, and lingering. He seemed to suck in your breath as he cupped the sides of your face and pressed himself lightly against you. _Yes!_ Your brain spat. _This. More of this is good!_

Breaking the kiss Sirius, asked you, “You never answered me?”  
  
“Huh? You said, dazed and hot.  
  
“Y/N, would you like to be my girlfriend?” You smiled at him running your hands down his torso and kissing his neck. “What would being your girlfriend entail?”

Sirius had, momentarily, closed his eyes at your touch and when he spoke again, his voice was raspy and low.

“Well,” he pondered, helping you to remove your jacket. “It would entail lots of dates with me."  
  
“Oh yeah?” You started to help him by taking off your top. “Like what?” 

“Dinners, picnics, motorbike rides, adventures…coffee?”

You gave a sharp intake of breath as his hand slipped under your pants. He kissed your neck continuing to whisper; “Movies, games, concerts, pub lunches… dog walking?”  
  
This caused a deep laugh to rumble up your belly and he used this moment to pick you up carry you over to the bed and drop you on it. Swiftly following he lay his head level with your pelvis and started to take off your pants.

“It would also entail this…”  
  
Sirius slipped his fingers under the thin band of your underwear and pulled, revealing your core to him.

“Mmmmm beautiful.” He hummed, licking his lips.

No more questions entered your mind from the moment he lowered his head and licked a stripe from the bottom of your folds to the top.   
  
The only words coming out of your mouth as he flicked your clit with his tongue was his name, followed by ‘FUCK!’ And “YES!”  
  
Strong hands held your hips down as he kept flicking your clit, vibrating it with his tongue until you were certain it was revved up enough to take off. Beads of electricity were making their way from his mouth into you, building and growing bigger until they had you on the edge of a precipice, ready and willing to fall happily over.

“Oh, Godric! Sirius!” You arched up into his mouth, back pressing away from the bed as you came.

Sirius had gone down on you before but your past trysts were often hurried and you never gave him the option to savour you, interrupting him by bringing his head back up to yours, believing that this was an action reserved for serious couples. Really though, you were self-conscious and didn’t know if he really wanted to. Now though, from the groans he made as he licked you and the hard bulge pressed against your leg where it lay, it seemed this was another area you hadn’t given him the chance in.

“Fuck! Sirius!” You gasped. “Yes! Yes! I’ll be your girlfriend if I get to have this! That was…wow….”  
  
The proud smile on his face made you blush. He moved up the bed, resting beside you, drawing circles across your hips as you came down from your high.  
  
“I’m glad!” He chuckled. “I wasn’t sure if you would go for the exclusivity thing.”  
  
“Sirius?” You held his face in your hand. “When I was with you, there never was anyone else.”  
  
His pupils dilated and he moved to kiss you deeply. 

Sirius was content to move at a slow pace, get to know each other again under these new circumstances but when he felt you begin to undo his shirt before moving down to feel inside his trousers, he hoped for more.  
  
Looking at you to check you were sure, he saw nothing but lust and love in your eyes.

“Y/N.” He rasped.  
  
“Take it off.” You demanded, tugging on his clothes.

Sirius reached in his back pocket for his wand, quickly uttered something with a circular movement disappearing the rest of his clothes.

“Just something, I’ve been practicing.” He smirked to your impressed look.  
  
Pausing only momentarily to marvel at Sirius’ extracurricular hobbies you slid further south, down his body, determined to repay the favour he just bestowed upon you. His pleasure not only was important to you, it also turned you on like nothing else. Seeing him moan, close his eyes tight as you held him in your mouth, lowing your head deeper and deeper until his hardness slid partway down your throat set of more lickerish desires in you. 

When you took him as deep into your throat as you could, he made a strangled noise in his throat, pushed himself up of the bed, and crumpled forward, another rough groan bursting out of his mouth.   
  
You stopped your assault on his cock to look at him, a smile on your face while noticing his eyes looked like they were about to pop out of their sockets and his breathing resembled a man running a marathon.

“Just something I’ve been practicing.” You said, cheekily before popping him back into your mouth.

Sirius couldn’t take it anymore, “I want to…” moans and expletives spilled out as he pulled you back up to him and guided you onto your back.

He kissed you deeply, taking his time and letting his racing heartbeat relax somewhat. He ran one hand down your leg and hooked it up around his waist. Pausing to bite on the special spot underneath your earlobe Sirius, positioned himself at your entrance and ever so slowly nudged the tip forwards.  
  
Feeling him there and wanting him to go deeper, had your hips pulsing up at him, wantonly asking him for more. He bit your neck, naughtily, and whispered, “Not until I say so!” 

It was excruciating having him right at the entrance and not moving in any further. Finally, he looked at you, holding your eyes as he slid into you, and flicking his hips up when he was fully sheathed.

The look in his eyes, one of utter rapture and delirium killed you a little. You closed your own and gave in to the sensations of Sirius Black’s carnal embrace.

Sirius’ edge was coming, you were grinding on his resistance and he was in desperate need to come. The blow job you had given him nearly made him faint. No one - and there had been a few - had taken him that deep before and seeing you happily lapping at his cock, moaning as it entered your mouth was in itself utter ecstasy, then you had to go and wow him with your technique. 

_I can’t believe she is mine and I hers!_ His brain kept replaying. He was still reeling from the fact you had said that you loved him - admittedly to a cat. He had been sure once he had confessed his feelings to you you would kindly, but politely let him down. Your response had been more than anything he could have hoped for.   
  
Voltaic charges were erupting throughout his body at each thrust. He could feel his orgasm rise. Fuck sex with you was everything he ever dreamed of. The way you moved around him and how soft your skin felt under his hands, not to mention the way you kissed him, desperate, needing, yet asking him to submit into you - it absolutely floored him.

You were crying out his name, moaning into his ear, his chest, his mouth.

“Sirius, right there! Don’t stop!” He angled his thrusts as you reached down to rub your clit, he growled at this, patting your hand way making you giggle. “Mine.” He said, territorially smirking at you.  
  
The roll of his pelvis, his ripped torso stroking your body ignited another orgasm. You looked at his strong muscled arms either side of your head giving you a VIP view of his hard pectorals and broad shoulders. Sweat formed on his neck as he moved. He was gorgeous.

You ran your hands down his back, digging your nails as he hit you right at the sweetest spot.

His thrusts became faster and you meeting his hips with your own continued to fan the fire inside his body.  
  
“Oh Godric, Y/N I’m going to come!”  
  
“Me too Sirius, kiss me!”  
  
He kissed you deeply then you both felt the explosion, groans loud enough to disturb a loft of pigeons resting outside your window.  
  
Sirius held himself up, shaking, beads of sweat dripping from his chest until you pulled him down into your arms holding him tight. He was completely crushing you with his body weight and it was glorious.

Eventually, he rolled over to his side as he let you wriggle out to go to the bathroom. On your return, he was still in the same position a dazed look on his face.  
  
‘You ok, Sirius?” _He wasn’t regretting this was he?_ Insecurity flared up in your brain.  
  
He snapped out of his trance, gave you a smile as he pulled you back onto the bed into his embrace. “Another thing about being my girlfriend…” He started, burying his face in your hair.  
  
“Yeah?” You encouraged.  
  
“You have to stay. You can’t leave after sex, especially in the middle of the night. ok?”  
  
You paused squeezing his arms tight against your chest. “Ok - I promise.”  
  
He sighed into your hair and you lay there for a long while, contentedly drifting in and out of consciousness until your stomach rudely interrupted by growling loudly.  
  
“Oh, yeah I haven’t eaten today.” You mused.  
  
“What?!” Sirius said, jolting awake. “We should definitely get you some food then!"  
  
He kissed you, got up slowly and stretched, giving you a rather wonderful view of his back muscles, before grabbing his wand and appearing his clothes in front of him.  
  
“What do you feel like?” He said as he pulled on his pants.  
  
You took a while to think about it as you slipped on a dress. “There is a cafe around the corner that is good - friendly wait staff” Sirius returned your smirk.

——

Out on the street, Sirius grabbed your hand as you walked side by side.   
  
“Another girlfriend duty?” You questioned.  
  
“Mmmmm” he murmured smiling at you.

It was a comfortable silence, you hadn’t felt this relaxed in a long time. Of course, the great shag notwithstanding, facing your inner fears had shattered a wall inside you, you hadn’t known was holding you back. Though the outcome was the best scenario you could have imagined - and it could have easily gone the other way - there was something empowering about standing up, facing your fears, and not running away.

“By the way, I never asked you.” Sirius gently interrupted your thoughts. “What does being your boyfriend entail?"  
  
“Hmmm?” You pondered placing an index finger to your chin for emphasis. “Let me think…"  
  
Flashes of your most titillating fantasies somersaulted into your mind, encouraging you to smirk at Sirius provocatively.  
  
“Oh yeah?” He grinned, catching your eye.  
  
“Oh yeah!” You replied, causing him to bite his lip and consider turning you both back towards home again.  
  
\----

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wonder what Y/N was thinking. What do you think her boyfriend list entails?


End file.
